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Waverley Parker

Waverley Parker published on 1 Comment on Waverley Parker

I used to have a 14cm Elfdoll tiny BJD; she was the early form of Geordie. You can see her with Dom and some other dolls here. I sold her because I really didn’t like her and she wasn’t very posable. Now that everyone and their friend is joining the LHF universe, I want to add a 14cm Elfdoll tiny back into the cast, not as a young child, but as an adult with achondroplasia. This form of dwarfism, which Davry has, usually allows people to top out at about 3.5 to 4 feet [e.g., Davry]. However, in some cases, it results in very small people, such as Jyoti Amge, a teen in India who recently broke the record for world’s smallest person. At 58cm and 11 pounds, she is just about the size and weight of an average 1:3 BJD. If you look at photos of her, she’s also incredibly charming and beautiful. She appears to be extroverted, friendly and welcoming of attention.

Given the exemplar of Jyoti Amge, I have decided that I’d like another person with achondroplastic dwarfism to join the LHF cast: Waverley Parker. She is a mortal, probably in her 30s, who works from home as a researcher for a market survey company. Every week, she gets an E-mail from her employers in Boston outlining the scope of the week’s survey, the target audience and the survey questions. Waverley uses her considerable charm to boost her response rate astronomically high, which leads to large bonuses. She has many phone friends, E-mail friends and even penpals that she has gotten to know from her survey calls. She usually burns through her week’s survey by about Wednesday morning, leaving her the rest of the week to chat, write, return E-mails and phone calls and otherwise verify her position as the most popular person on the Internet that you’ve never heard about.

Not only is Waverley financially comfortable because of her frequent bonuses, but she’s also rather happy. She exchanges gifts, photos and money with her correspondents, and they also visit her. She prefers communicating over distance and having people visit on her terms because she’s rather skittish about being out in public.  She has been bitten by a dog in the past, and, in one case, picked up by some drunken college girls. They only let her go after she bit a chunk out of her attacker’s left nostril. The attackers sued Waverley, causing a media frenzy with embarrassing headlines referring to Waverley as a "pint-sized piranha." Waverley became a celebrity among people with disabilities, especially others with achondroplastic dwarfism. The OPSS or Organization of People of Small Stature championed her cause and a member who was a lawyer defended her pro bono. Waverley v. Idiots eventually settled out of court for an undisclosed sum of money paid by Idiots to Waverley for "emotional pain and suffering," to Waverley’s lawyer for case costs and to OPSS for the furtherance of its mission. Rather embarrassed and rattled by the whole production, Waverley crawled into the woodwork, where she has remained since.

As I have mentioned, she is pretty pleased with her life now. She has an entourage of admirers, including several "grandmas," as she calls them, who dote on her, sewing her custom-made clothes and cooking care packages, as well as some "grandpas," who create adaptive aids for her so that she can handle 1:1 appliances and tools. She also mentors some students in special ed in the Cambridge Public Schools. They think that she’s awesome, smart and really cool, and she enjoys their energy and their complete lack of knowledge of her celebrity. She also corresponds with some other women her age with disabilities, some of whom have visited her.

However, she is really bored. She can do her job without thinking, and all the friends that she makes telephonically cannot compensate for the crashing boredom induced by her work. She also doesn’t have any local friends around her age. She thinks about going out and meeting people, but she also fears being physically harmed.

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